12 January 2011

The Creepiest Pokemon

When I was younger I loved Pokemon cards. I'd trade with the boys at recess (and they usually successfully ripped me off by offering me the cards with the coolest pictures) and I watched the show regularly. In the past year I started playing the games again. It wasn't until recently that I realize how creepy some of the pokemon are.

So, here's my list, in no particular order.

 1. Mr.  Mime.

I would never, and I repeat NEVER, allow this creature to survive if I ever ran into it. If it pops out of the dark at me and starts doing it's Light Screen or whatever, I will not hesitate to end it's entire existence.


2. Jinx.

First off, What is it? Is it female?  If all of the Jinx's wear that weird bra thing, it suggests they are all female. How do they reproduce? Maybe they are both. I feel like it would try to take advantage of me in my sleep.

 3. Charmeleon.

Okay, this one might not be as self explanatory as the others. For some reason Charmeleon has always made me feel uncomfortable. Perhaps it's because he looks like a pre-pubescent teenage version of cute little Charmander. He looks like that kid who would try to convince a weaker-minded kid that the dog poo on the grass is chocolate icecream.

4. Manky.

NO. JUST NO. I don't like it when you pop out of the grass at me while I'm trying to catch something worthwhile on the way to Saffron City. You're almost as bad as Pidgey. 

5. Hypno. 

Oh. OH. Look at him! "Come on over and I'll show you a cool trick....yeah, that's right. Go to sleep. Yessssss." And then he's really a sociopath who hypnotizes people into submission and then has his way with them. 

I feel like he should also be wearing some pants.

I think by the time they got above a hundred they started to run out of good ideas for pokemon.



Other creepy pokemon:
These didn't make the cut, but they still make me feel weird when I look at them.
-Electabuzz - IT HAS MAN ARMS.
-Mewtwo - yeah, no.
-Machop - ....
-Gengar - he reminds me of Danny DeVito.
-Likitung - if it weren't for the massive slobbery tongue, it'd be cute.


Gwennifer said...

It is my opinion that videos of Jinx and Mr. Mime mating populate jumbotrons that cover every surface of Hell.

Rachel said...

Speaking of Pokemons and disturbing:

Check this out.

Hannah Hillam said...

Gwen, SERIOUSLY! It will be the most terrible thing ever.

Hannah Hillam said...

Oh, and Rachel...WOW. Those are amazing! Except the one of Electabuzz breastfeeding its baby is pretty disgusting. Also, Lickitung...

Rachel said...

I dunno. I'm pretty creeped out by Eevee's eyes. And also Polywrath eating that other little pokemon. Gross.

Rachel said...

And Raichu is CRAZY!

moo said...

Am I right in thinking that I was one of those boys? I remember trading them at recess.....

Drea said...

Another Pokemon lover?
Haha, I started a fanfic pokemon comic about my bff and cousin.

Glad you're on the crazytrain, too.

I totally agree about Charmeleon.

And yes, Jinx's boobs are mysterious.

Anonymous said...

WHAT? I love Mewtwo! It was my favorite as a kid, and it's still my favorite now.

I think I liked it the best because it could actually talk instead of make stupid sounds.

And it was bad-a. So cool.

Otherwise a perfect list.

Anonymous said...

WHAT?!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Porygon is one of...no not one of, its my FAVORITE pokemon.